Words

       Well hello my old but new friend, my blog. I know it's been awhile. I know I committed to reach out to you at least once a month. I'm sorry. I could list a litany of excuses to justify why my efforts have been sorely lacking. Truthfully I feel like we shouldn't meet up unless I have something AMAZING to share with you. I get lost in all the other phenomenal blogs out there and easily fall prey to comparing and falling short of their quality, skill and finesse. I mean, let's be honest, I am no gifted writer. I am but a humble girl, looking to put my thoughts down on paper. I use to fill journal after journal with all the tidbits, dreams, prayers and random thoughts floating around in my head and heart. Sadly now my writing ability with a pen is almost nonexistent. I started this blog to pick that old hobby back up. I intended to dust it off and pick up right where I left off in my last leather bound journal. Nope. Dropped that one real quick. Typing my random thoughts on a laptop almost seems cheap and not as artistic. I love watching the ink spill onto the paper, I like seeing pages filled, and stacks of various journals. However, not blogging is only adding to my misery. My thoughts fill me up like water sometimes that needs to be poured out. When I don't intentionally let them seep out whether on paper or here on this laptop, they start to turn stagnant. There's nothing fresh that can be poured in if that makes any sense. 

       So my neglected friend, my fledgling blog . . . I am going to make a commitment to you. I promise to spend some more quality time with you. Especially with my beloved off in another country doing that amazing thing he does, serving selflessly. 
        I miss that man something fierce. Whew. Now there's a place I can pour out all my random wonderings and he so patiently sits there and sifts through them all, pulling out the treasures and setting aside the nonsense. That man, over the past 19 years of loving me, has become a skilled listener, a tenderhearted ear for me to whisper my most precious secrets too. He holds my heart securely in his unconditional love. He wipes my tears. He holds my hand. He gives me his undivided attention. I'm crying now just thinking of all he is to me and all he does for me. Sweet Jesus, what a gift you've given me in this husband. This man, my beloved, helped birth this newborn blog before he left us. He tells me time and time again my words are powerful. He tells me my words encourage his spirit to get back up and stay the path one more day. 

The tongue can bring death or life Proverbs 18:21

The very next verse blows me away. Is it possible that simply by speaking words of encouragement over my beloved that I am bringing favor into his life, and blessing him?

The man who finds a wife finds a treasure,

    and he receives favor from the Lord. Proverbs 18:22

      Whenever I blog, good stuff happens. It's a letting of my soul. Almost like a seeping a wound. Stuff leaks out and immediately I'm feeling relief. It amazes me sometimes when I just force myself to sit and type, not even knowing what to type, out it flows. Before I know it I'm typing faster and faster until my fingers can barely keep up with thoughts pouring out.

Let's be honest blog, this is therapeutic for me, isn't it? I'm an old soul. I need to write down my inner voice. The voice that should speak up and out loud more. But that's another blog, for another day.